Kid Logic


From observing my son’s actions for his entire life, and from hearing stories of similar decisions made by other people’s children, I’m starting to develop some theories on what goes on inside a child’s mind:


  • “When mom tells me to stop doing something 100 times, I only get hurt 4 of those times, therefore, listening to mom is pointless 96% of the time.” 
  • “My parents said I need to ask before taking items from other people.  I asked, so I can have it.  They may not have said yes, but it doesn’t matter.  They never said the other person had to say yes.  They just said I need to ask first.  I asked.  I even said please.  That means it’s mine now.”
  • “If my parents aren’t responding to my tantrum, it must mean they didn’t hear me.  I should move closer and repeat the whole performance for their benefit.”
  • “I have to stop playing to get a diaper change, and I don’t want to stop playing.  So when I’m playing, and someone asks if I need a diaper change, I should say no, even if it means getting a diaper rash…
    …but if I get a diaper change at night, I get to delay going to bed.  So after bedtime, I should get up and ask for a diaper change, even if my diaper is dry.”
  • “Mom doesn’t like to see water getting splashed all over the bathroom, so I should try to time my splashes when she blinks.  That will be really helpful.”
  • The Boy Who Cried Wolf isn’t relevant to my life, because I never actually claimed to have seen a wolf.”
  • “Similarly, the whole No more monkeys jumping on the bed thing doesn’t apply to me, because I’m not a monkey.”
  • “I’m only supposed to come out of my room at night if I need something, so I should try to come up with things I need…
    “I need a diaper change.”
    “I need water.”
    hmm… Have I run out of excuses to get up?  Oh, what about:
    “I need to go to bed!” …Yeah, I can totally use that when I get up and Dad asks what I need.”
  • “My parents said I could be anything, so I want to be a sandwich!”




This list was inspired by my “I told you so” post from last time, about my toddler and his tendency to get hurt doing things he was told not to do.

In telling that story, I realized my son probably thinks I’m wrong most of the time since he so often gets lucky and does not get hurt, which led me to think about other “logic” he may be coming up with…

Have you learned any pieces of logic from your own kids?

If so, feel free to comment, or write an entire list of your own, so we can all benefit from their wisdom!  😉



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